Monday, March 13, 2006

Hard Day

Today was a really hard day for me.

I woke up with all of the positive energy drained out of me. Maybe there is some sort of energy draining gremlin sleeping peaceful (and well fed) under my bed.

I have been struggling to make it through the day.

This job is wonderfully designed
to completely test those things in me
that I thought were the strongest.

I did not realize how quickly and completely I could go from "full steam ahead" to "quivering on the floor like a blob of warm jelly".

The energy draining gremlins here have learned how to avoid my current armada of coping mechanisms, and render me completely overwhelmed. I must remember, this too is what I wanted.

This life is wonderfully designed
to completely test those things in me
that I thought were the strongest.

This too, is what I wanted,
for I was unsure of my metal,
and longed to feel my own frailty.

For in viewing what is truly weak in me,
I believe I will find a strength
that will help everyone I meet.

1 comment:

Jen J said...

Hi, Jay!

My energy-draining gremlins do their best work when I am underwhelmed; I'm easier to catch then, because I'm moving so slowly.

Today seems to be one of those days.

Yesterday was a different story. We got a foot of fresh snow, so I left work early, shovelled the driveway (okay, half of the driveway - my sister worked on the other half), and took my dog to the local dog park, where we totally enjoyed the snow-covered woods and fields. It was all very calming.

Today I'm struggling to stay on task, mostly because there aren't many tasks available to complete. I'm tempted to bail, but I'm going to wait it out a bit.

Your gremlins will get bored and move on soon, I'm sure. Mine do.

JSJ